How To Deepen Your Self Love
We can only love as deeply as we love ourselves.
In my work I often say
“the center of everything is love, and at the center of love… is You.”
It’s all you reflecting you back to you.
So when we find little problems arise, whether it’s in love or success or abundance as a whole - when we experience lack
It’s because we’ve disconnected from the Love of Ourselves.🥹
We can try and run from it, but the only antidote is to go deeper inside.
Here are my suggestions for deepening the love of You (so that you can have more love, period)
1. READ: read books that challenge you, that challenge your beliefs and force you to expand yourself past your current bubble of influence. For men, I recommend the way of the superior man & breaking the habit of being yourself. For women, i recommend dear lover & pussy a reclamation. Also, the happiness advantage is a wonderful book.
2. COMMUNITY: Be very discerning with who you surround yourself with. Make sure the people in your life can hold your ups and downs, don’t just want you to drink and forget about it, and are ACTUALLY in your corner. People who understand boundaries and accept “no” as an answer. I was talking to my friend last weekend and she said “I’m so glad I have people in my life who are always in my partners corner. Because I’m such a runner, every time I try to make up problems they have his back. Which, in turn, means they have my back & are fighting for my happiness” and I just smiled at how profound that is. They actually want her happiness, even if that means they see her a little less. If there are people in your life who are “successful” but not happy, don’t take advice from them.
3. BOUNDARIES: Being a yes person all the time is exhausting. When we are disconnected from Us, we’ll say yes to anything that fills the space that feels empty. Start setting boundaries, saying no, and doing things by yourself. Hike, beach, travel. A No is love, too.
4. MIRROR WORK: this is where we get edgy. Look at yourself in the mirror and really see yourself. What parts do you not like, what parts do you like? Can you learn to accept you for You? This is the place to find that acceptance.
5. SELF PLEASURE RITUALS: learn to be with yourself intimately, to explore yourself and understand what you like. Practice tantric practices that take you deeper into your own soul that completely dissolve unhealthy sexual shame and/or disconnection.
6. STOP SCROLLING: social media has connected us more than ever, while also giving us a menu of opportunities that make your life feel like it’s never enough. So check your socials, but stop mindless scrolling. It’s literally harming our brains. No wonder depression and anxiety are at an all time high.
If we want to heal love and relationship on the planet, we start with the one we have with ourselves first. If we want to feel happy, we start with Us. If we want more success, wealth, and abundance, the relationship begins with ourselves. There are so many incredible tools to deepen your relationship with you, and when you’re courageous enough to go there - you make the world a better place.
To dive deeper into this work, check out The Activated Woman Podcast.
